Thai Bar Secrets Every First-Timer Must Know! If you’re worried about getting scammed, losing money, or just looking clueless in a Thai bar… here’s what you NEED to know before you order your first drink.
Disclaimer: This isn’t a “how to exploit Thai women” guide. It’s just some lighthearted tips to help travelers avoid awkward moments, overcome the language barrier, understand thai culture a bit better, and simply have a better conversation with the angels of the land of smiles. Because it is in fact a huge problem that nobody anticipates before arrival. How to talk to women that barely speak any English? In this guide, I'll prepare you for all the exclamations and questions, explain the true meaning, equip you with clever answers, sweet compliments, and stupid little jokes, and warn you about the biggest mistakes you can make in a Thai bar. This guide will save you time, money, and embarrassment.
The Basics
This conversation guide isn't about the polite lady at the hotel reception or the hard-working 7-Eleven girl behind the counter. You probably won't have a private conversation with them. This guide covers the majority of Thai women you encounter in tourist hotspots — bar girls.
In Thailand's nightlife, the most common business you'll encounter is a bar with an open front and many female staff members. They're hired for promotion, public relations, and maximizing the bar's profit by luring guests inside and making them feel welcome so they order more drinks for themselves and the women. That's how bar girls make money — by commission.
The usual interaction is very awkward: two human beings from completely different backgrounds, cultures, religions, a huge language barrier — and not one common talking point. She's never heard of Donald Trump. You can't name the Thai province you're in. So you can already assume how fast this conversation becomes very boring. Especially if you're an introvert.
But there's hope. The first half of the conversation is driven by the women. Why? They are the host, you are the guest. And every Thai bar girl learns the same exact set of phrases and questions from the more experienced colleagues. It's like a playbook. Also known as the Ploy Book — passed on from generation to generation.
After studying this conversation firsthand for years, I noted all the typical phrases. I even let some Pattaya bar girls fact-check it. Result: they were rolling on the floor laughing. "Oh velly good. Why you know too mutt?!"
I don't call them out. I'm just fascinated by the gameplay. You really can learn a lot from them in terms of conversation starters and asking the right questions. They are doing that professionally.
The 7 Biggest Mistakes
You are participating in a game without knowing the rules. Avoid these 7 mistakes.
